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Tuesday, December 25, 2012

The four pillars of our life


It’s almost the end of 2012, and for many it’s time for retrospection.

I have this thought lingering in mind for many years now, and its time to put it down in black and white. Life for us is getting busier balancing the needs of ever-busy profession, family, ultra active kids, friends, social work, networking, studying, shopping, gazing at all sorts of screens from TV to iPad, etc.…

Its time to re-prioritize our attention to the most important things in our life. I call them the “Four Pillars”. They are for me
1. Health
2. Family
3. Friends
4. Spirituality


1.     Health – No need to mention the importance of Health, which we often ignore. The whole social and professional setup is against it these days. Abundant food causing the Obesity menace; Ubiquitous stress at work, while commuting (especially in developing world) and even at home.

Without good health we cannot be in position to enjoy the fruits of our labor.

How to keep the Health pillar strong?
  1. Learn how to cope with stress and take frequent breaks. Read on Stress by Deepak Chopra
  2. Keep a regular check on your health parameters, and listen to your body and mind.
  3. Give means and happiness to the ones in dire need.

2.     Family – It’s your closest family members, your spouse and kids and parents, who love you selflessly. Their love and support to each other can be the most important thing in our lives. Do you recollect the tears of happiness on seeing your tender newborn baby? Can you compare this happiness to anything else in life?

This machinery needs some maintenance i.e. regular servicing.

How to keep the Family pillar strong?
  1. Say you love them, as often as you feel so.
  2. Care for them when they need most, and stand behind them in need.
  3. Give second priority to your dreams, for making their dreams come true.


3.     Friends – Well I am sure most of us have friends who know all our weaknesses, secrets, and silly things we did in the process of growing up. And if you are still in touch with friends from teenage school and college days, you know the deep bond I am talking about.

It’s interesting that as we grow-up from a teenager to an adult it’s the friends with whom we share all crazy ideas and impossible dreams. And it’s the never-ending talks/discussions with these friends, which is the test-lab of our radical thoughts and ideas, which later make us the person we are today.

Unlike with Family, with Friends there is no obligation to continue bonding… And this no obligation makes this relationship more special. And we need to keep this fire on.

How to keep the Friends pillar strong?
  1. Go to outings just with friends, as you used to do before your spouse came in your life.
  2. Keep your ego in check. You may be socially and financially stronger than other. But friends are always equal.
  3. You might have grown up now, but the fun is to continue sharing your secrets/thoughts as you did when you were a teenager. You need to vent out your emotions unchecked.

 4.     Spirituality – Spirituality is not being religious. It is much superior and is about knowing your Self (Conscience) and being answerable and true to it. 

There will be trying times in life when neither your family nor friends will have belief, or will support in what you are saying, or want to achieve. In those times you have to walk alone. And you will do it because your mind and your Self (God or Universe or Conscience) believes in you. Rather just because you want to achieve it badly, the whole Universe gets ready in preparation and helps and supports you in getting your dreams come true.

How to keep the Spirituality pillar strong?
  1. Know your Self (Conscience). Listen to it. And you need silence for that. Not devoid sound but devoid thoughts. Simple meditation with focus on breathing helps.
  2. Spend quality time with yourself. Brood, think, write and enjoy being alone.
  3. Retrospect your day before you go to sleep. Understand the cause and effect of actions and thoughts today and correct them next day.

These Four Pillars are important for success and a happy and contended life.
Yes your life can stand on three pillars as well. But the foundation will be weaker. And it cannot stand on two pillars. The choice is yours…

You might feel that your Dollar Net Worth might be lesser if you have to focus on all four pillars. I think its better to be worth $1 MN with all 4 pillars strong, than worth $10 MN with only 3 pillars…

What do you say?

Pillars of the "Sagrada Familia" in Barcelona, Spain


Mahtab Syed
25th Dec 2012
Paris